A large expedition set out to explore the deepest, darkest part of the Amazonian Jungles. Three of the men got disconnected from the expedition and wandered wandered the jungle aimlessly looking for their lost party. As the walked through the jungle, they found what looked like primitive grave markers. All of a sudden, they were struck with darts and fell into unconsciousness.
When they awoke, they were in a small village surrounded by a several hundred natives. The first thing they noticed was that these savages had enormous penises that damn near touched the ground!
The chief came out swinging his huge dong like a pocket-watch. He stepped forward and spoke... "You have disturbed the peace of the jungle and desecrated the graves of our ancestors! For this, you will be punished!"
The three men apologized and tried to plead for their lives.
The chief listened without any hint of compassion and then said, "I will give you two choices. You can undergo the ritual of Unga Bunga or you can choose death! Once the ritual is completed, you are free to leave! What say you?"
The men ask what the ritual of Unga Bunga is and the chief replies, "You will have to satisfy every man in the tribe. What do you choose, Unga Bunga or death?"
The first man figures that he'll have to jerk off the whole tribe or maybe even give them all blow jobs, but he figures it's worth it just to live! So, he says, "Unga Bunga!! I want Unga Bunga! I WANT TO LIVE!"
At that point, the man is strapped down and his pants are removed. The man quickly realizes that this is going to be far more involved than a blow job. The next thing he knows, every man in the village walks up to take a turn banging the crap out of him with their gigantic penises. Once they're done, the man is released.
The guy is in horrifying pain and he begins to stumble out of the village just happy to be alive. As he leaves, he creates of trail made by the gobs of semen that spill from his anus.
The chief asks the second man for a decision.
The second man thinks for awhile and says, "I want to live. The pain will be almost unbearable, but I want to live. I'll take Unga Bunga."
So, the process is repeated. Unfortuantely, all the men in the village just did their business in the first guy, so their stamina is extraordinary! The process takes three times as long.
The second man is let go. He's in so much pain that he can't even move his legs. He crawls out of the village with his bleeding anus throbbing behind him. But he's happy to be alive.
The chief asks the third man to decide.
The third man responds, "Death or Unga Bunga, huh? Yeah, well, screw that! Just kill me!"
The chief holds up his arms and shouts to the villagers, "DEATH!!!! BY UNGA BUNGA!!!!"