* Have you heard about the new corduroy pillows? * They're making headlines!
* Why didn't the little girl want to leave nursery school? * She wanted to be a nurse.
* When is a school paper not a school paper? * When it's turned into the teacher.
* What's Mary short for? * She's got no legs.
* What is a dentist's favorite musical instrument? * A tuba toothpaste.
* Why was Jon walking backwards on the first day of school? * Everyone kept saying it was back to school time.
A guy went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I keep having these alternating recurring dreams. First I'm a teepee, then I'm a wigwam, then I'm a teepee, and then I'm a wigwam. It's driving me crazy. What's wrong with me?"
The doctor replied, "It's very simple. You're two tents."
* Why does a chicken coop have only two doors? * If it had four, it would be a chicken sedan.
* What do you say when a dog runs away? * Dog-gone!